(Stolen from Brittany) Wouldn't it be nice to have Character Diaries? @w@ We can know your characters inner thoughts and how they're really doing. D: Only one diary entry per day per character though. Make sure to date the entry X3
-- Edited by Severin on Saturday 30th of May 2009 12:59:12 PM
We're all gonna go camping! Whoo-hoo! I just hope I'm healthy enough to go. Even if I'm not I still want to go! I love hanging out with the Host Club Members! They're so much fun and so flattering. It's just what I need sometimes because Nerdrum and Hazel won't let me hang out with them.
So it seems I have to drop all of those crushes I have. Vanney is definitally into Ruri and too many people are into Viktor. He also seems to be with Sonnet a lot which is okay. Sonnet's really pretty. Adam seems to like cute boys. Ack. I'm going to shove myself into the normal looking corner. Why did Nerdrum have to get all the looks? Sometimes it's not fair.
Cornie attacked me again! Silly person and his silly attackings of silliness. He's just too silly. I like the word silly, it sounds fun! So tomorrow we're going to go poof to go camping! My Doctor told me not to because I won't be able to survive without medical attention for too long. PFFTT! Who cares what he says because he said I wouldn't live past my fourteenth birthday and look at me now!
Nerdrum's birthday is coming up soon. Hazel and I are going to buy him a really nice chess set and tea set! He'll love it. I just know it. You know, he acts cold but he really is starting to open up to people even if it's just a little. It's making me kind of happy. Hazel is noticing it too.
Never, ever, ever destroy little buildings Hazel makes. I found that out the hard way. She chased me around the house with a shoe yesterday! Geez! Hazel said she wants to be an Architect and a Lawyer. She loves both! Haha, I'm proud of her.
I've noticed there is a lot of romance developing between the hosts and hosts, hosts and clients, and clients and clients. Maybe I should give them all a push at the camping trip so that they can notice it. Silly people are too shy. I don't like it when people are shy because then nothing ever gets said or done. But then again I also don't like it when people just give up for other people. Haha! So that means I don't like myself. Mm.. Nerdrum tells me I have to be selfish sometimes but I just can't. I can never be selfish.
Oh dear. Ani and Hazel are planning something. How odd of them to do such a thing. Hazel is not the kind of girl to be sneaky. I know that Ani is, he is extremely sneaky. Poor boy. Anyway, I am going to take everyone camping today. I hope they have fun. I'm going to tell Ani the wrong departure time. He needs to stay home or he'll just get worse.
Ani and I are going to buy Nerdrum a nice chess set for his birthday. We hope he will like it. As usual I did not do much today except watch the hosts. They are all quite beautiful. I am very impressed. I think I should make friends on this trip. Possibly. As long as they do not ruin my sand castles I will be fine.
-Hazel
-- Edited by Severin on Saturday 30th of May 2009 01:14:48 PM
So Nerdrum stuck me in a cabin with Cornelius. Ah, how odd. I will make sure to keep the loud people away for I know how sick Cornelius is. I hope he feels well enough to help me make a house of cards. Ah, I feel that for once I might just flaunt myself a bit and wear something a bit edgy for the beach. I wonder if anyone will ask me to change. Maybe. Maybe not. It all depends on how people react.
Ani stuck himself in a suitcase. I mean come on, who doesn't know that a suitcase labeled "Not Ani" means that Ani is actually in there. Poor boy. I hope he doesn't suffocate. Nerdrum is going to hate quite a fit when he finds out that Ani snuck on board. Sometimes I wonder how much the boy pays attention to detail. Maybe it is only when he is playing chess.
I do think that he needs to pay more attention to his brother. Every time I am over at his house, which is a lot since we're neighbors, he shuns Ani away, especially when there are women around. This probably is not a good thing. Ani could develop a sense of hatred for women. It's odd to write but I don't think I've ever seen him actually look at a woman. Ah, I hope he is not a homosexual. The poor boy won't be able to take the abuse of those who are against homosexuals. Maybe I should have someone show him some porn.
I'm stuck in a suitcase. It is SO hard to WRITE in here! And breath. I'm kind of getting a bit dizzy. Well, I guess I could unzip it a bit to get more air but people might hear me. If they do then Nerdrum will turn the limo back around and send me home. I don't want that. I want to hang out with everyone. Why won't he let me have any fun?
I have everyone's things packed and we're heading to camp. I left Ani at home for it is for his own good. That young man should learn to listen to his Doctor's instead of going out and rough housing all the time. Hazel is wearing something a bit revealing. It is hard not to stare, but I must not stare. I will not stare and I WILL make sure NO ONE ELSE stares.
I really want to dance with Vanney or Viktor at the fire... But I just can't. No, I can't do it. I'll keep them from dancing with some really cool sweet nice funny person. I don't want to be selfish. God I'm so freaking selfish.. I just.. need to stop thinking. Stop thinking. Stop liking. Stop dreaming. Nerdrum used to tell me that dreaming was bad for me because I'd get my hopes up and later have them crushed. But I can't stop dreaming or liking or thinking. Geez... What's wrong with me... I don't understand it. I just... don't.. get it. Vanney really likes Ruri and a lot of other people really like Viktor. ****. I need to stop with these problems and smile more. Yeah.. That's what I should do.
Ani is here. Damn it all. I tried so hard to get him to stay home. If he gets hurt or sick I'm not taking responsibility. I told him to stay home and he didn't listen. It's his fault.
-P.S Why must Hazel have such.. nice.. cleavage....
Left notes in Vanney and Viktor's cabin. I was so flustered all I could write was "I like you." I didn't even sign it. Eh-heh-heh-heh-... heh-.... riighhhttt.... Gonna do stuff now....
So I got to sleep with Lars today! Hurray! He's like a big giant sleepy warm pillow! I saw him sleeping under a tree in the shade and just kinda flopped on him to sleep. It was kinda nice. He didn't really say anything, just kinda slept after giving me a weird look. He's kind of a cool person!
I wonder if Vanney and Viktor knew that it was me who gave them the note. I left them another one earlier today too. It was an apology.... I think it went like..
"I'm sorry for the note earlier. It was kind of stupid of me to do that, wasn't it. I'm really sorry...
-Ani"
But I didn't give it to Vanney! Kind of hoping she might think it is from Ruri or something. Those two are pretty cute together. I hope the realize it sooner or later.
I'm giving up completely. Yes, that is right. No longer will I chase after any kind of romance. I'm just not cut out for it. I just can't do it. Or at least not with anyone else in the club. They all have love interests and stuff and you can tell who is meant for who. I'm going to try my best to forget that I liked Vanney and Viktor and just watch everyone from afar. This is for the best... I know it is. This trip made me realize many things. It's not just personality that counts, but looks as well. I had to look average and normal didn't I? Damnit....
I know it is a bit hard, but I am trying my best to get over my feelings for Vanney and Viktor. It would be difficult and a bit painful to pursue them when I know quite well they are not into me. Besides, Viktor is Xavier's type and those two can fit well together. Right? Anyways, I've been having fun on this trip. It is sad that we have to leave soon. But the festival is coming up soon! How exciting! Maybe the fashion club can make the Photo and Journalism club awesome outfits! OoOOo! We should cross dress. That would be hilarious! Pfftttt, Viktor in a dress!
I... am in.. a dress. Why? Just... why... Ani JUST HAD to put one on too. Now I can't stop staring.. These are dangerous feelings here... Maybe I should see a psychologist.. or talk to Kurau.
Does anyone else think that Kurau's name remind you are "Cow You"? Silly isn't it? I'm going to go attack more people with silly string with Sterre. She is quite a fun young girl. Rather short though... Oh well.
Process of getting over Vanney and Viktor, 30%. You know, I do not like wearing dresses. This corset dress kind of hurts. But I will keep Nerdrum from being embarrassed by wearing one too! That will make him feel better! I know it will because he keeps staring at my funny. Silly man. He must think I look super silly!
I talked to Kurau about my problem with Ani today. He kept telling me that he would support me if I.. "chose". I do not want to be with my brother. No, it is wrong. It is so very wrong. There is no way I would want to be with him. Incest is completely wrong! Kurau is horrible with advice, telling me to spend more time with Ani. But my mind is not straying away from my beloved younger brother. He is exactly the opposite of what I like. He's ditzy, silly, sick... small... fragile... and very... soft and ten- what am I thinking? Why am I writing this?! Hazel told me it was best to get what you think out on paper so that it does not fester within you. But these emotions keep festering. They keep building up, getting stronger each time I see him. I hope this trip ends soon. I do not wish to see him anymore. We live in different houses so once we're done camping I won't have to look at his smiling face. Why... Why must he be so... bright and selfless. I can't fall for him so deeply.... These feelings aren't right. But they make my chest hurt...
It seems I have to smack a bit of sense into Nerdrum tomorrow. I overheard his conversation with Kurau. No, I do not think Nerdrum is in love with Ani. I just think he has not opened his heart to anyone else but Ani. Well, he kind of forced his way in but that does not matter. Nerdrum can be a bit slow when he is confused, but trust me, I do not think this is love.
I wonder if I can adopt Sterre as a younger sister....
Nerdrum keeps running away from me today! Gah! Nothing really eventful happened. I tried to use Lars as a pillow but he wouldn't let me. Evil man. Tomorrow I should poke people with marshmellows! That would be fun!
